I have no shortage experience with bad drinks. Genny Light, Everclear, mixed drinks made with a splash of all six nearly-empty liqueurs left at on the table at 3 a.m., old milk – I went to college and I know what I’m talking about.
But Tupper’s Hop Pocket Ale is a step above the rest in terms of nastiness and could put up a respectable fight for the title of Worst Beer Ever. Produced by Old Dominion Brewing Company, a producer of a wide line of awful beers that take up valuable tap slots across the region, Tuppers’ is touted as “a rich harvest ale, deep gold & extravagantly hopped.” What does that mean? It means that in lieu of the careful brewing required to produce a quality tasty beer with character, the brew is so severely hopped that it washes out any other vector of flavor.
Like Michael’s spicy cole slaw at a recent Fourth of July BBQ, you’re initially fooled by the texture into thinking it’s going to be just like the other beers (or cole slaws) you’ve had – the cold and refreshing part comes through first. Then Tuppers’ grabs a hold of your tongue and palate, mashing its extreme hoppiness into your powerless flesh. It’s like rubbing a wet cloth covered in topsoil and white vinegar and around your mouth.
The Tuppers’ on my desk that I’m fighting through now in the name of online culinary journalism is a leftover from a party in which only four beers out of a six-pack got opened, all of which were tasted by the opener and then passed over to some unsuspecting fool who in turn took a sip, grimaced and started looking for another victim. At the end of the night, all of the other beer was long gone, but three of the four open Tuppers’ sat on tables, half-finished and cursed by nearly every attendee.
Consider yourself warned.
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14Jul
11 Responses
I agree with you about Old Dominion’s beer in general, but I always kind of liked Hop Pocket. For me, worst beer EVER would have to go to either Dogfish Head’s Chicory Stout (fun fact: Chicory is also know as Succory), or one of the Arrogant Bastard Ales with chocolate in ’em.
1. I’m mildly insulted that you put my coleslaw in the same category as this beer. Just because normal people didn’t grow up under the impression that habaneros were for snacking doesn’t mean you should be so afriad of tongue-burn. 😉
2. The Hop Pocket was really, phenominally nasty. I think I may heve been one of the pass-it-on culprits.
I don’t think I can physically apologize for this anymore. I’m all “I’m so so sorry”ed out. But I did drink a whole one as penance.
I wish I’d noticed Old Dominion made it. I could have just bought a six pack of skunked Bud for the same expierience.
and yes the Dogfish label is the art-punk of the beer world. It’s clever but I’d rather read about it.
-W
“art-punk of the beer world” – heh. I’m still waiting for Out Hud IPA or Black Dice Stout. Mmmmm, distortion…
Shorter version of the above post: “I don’t like hops, and no one else should either.” I love Tupper’s, and I’d gladly take any remaining unopened ones off your hands. I can’t help but wonder if that six-pack was skunked or something in order for it to be so thoroughly rejected.
But have you tried McEwan’s Scotch Ale? It’s like liquid bacon.
Well no, Carl.
Most beer has flavor besides raw hops. The hop pocket was ‘over’ hopped (note that I said ‘over’ as opposed to ‘poisoned by exposure to’). It had an almost bitter chemical flavor. I’m a fan of a nice sharp hoppy German style pilsner. But those beers use hops for flavor and to help clarify. It’s not the exclusive focus of the beer.
It’s good they’ve identified their market and I hope they keep produce Hop Pocket for you. But it’s a stank nasty beer.
-W
The six pack wasn’t skunked and Old Dominion isn’t such a high output brewery that I’d expect to find many skunked six packs from them.
On the other hand, no putting down dogfish head raison d’etre. It’s what you give your girlfriend who doesnt like beer. Good good stuff.
Couldn’t disagree more. Tupper’s Hop Pocket is the FIRST beer I look for whenever I’m at a new bar. I love it my friends do, too.
I certainly don’t understand where you’re getting this impression of harshness from. As an ale fan, I think it’s extremely drinkable and I like the complexity of the hops.
Beeradvocate.com gives it an 87 (recommended): http://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/3620/2898/
Tuppers is an outstanding beer. Maybe you enjoy the hopless trendy euro-lagers a bit too much and think they have hops.
Also Dogfish Head kicks butt. Their minute series of IPA’s are out of this world. And Arrogant Bastard (AKA Stone Brewing) has no ale with chocolate in it.
Why dont you all go back to cosmos or what have you and leave the flavourful beer to the professionals
Well, this is my first time reading this thread, but I felt compelled to put my vote in for Old Dominion, as well as the two beers that Tupper makes. I am going to also give a nod to Dogfish head. If I could afford their beers I would drink them all the time. I have been a brewer for over a decade and can say first hand that these are very quality products. I of course acknowledge that preferences are subjective, however I think it is a shame to bash the work of talented and dedicated professionals based on an individual taste, as though you had some objective authority on the subject.