While America is reaching a level of economic imperialism unimaginable during the European colonization era of the 17th Century, spreading a slickly-marketed culture to the entire globe, Canada remains an unassuming, sensible, New World counterpart, a Canuck Abbott to our Yankee Costello. They look like us, talk like us, but ain’t U.S.
There’s a lot to love about Canada. Excellent skiing, panoramic views, immaculate cities. Regional beers so strong that that they make you forget you’re living in a town called Dildo. Legal Cuban cigars. Evangeline Lilly. Truly, all things to be proud of, and their desire to protect their culture from American influence is noble, but as their desire to remain Canadian is strong, America’s desire to be Canadian is stronger.
Their beloved candy bar, Coffee Crisp, is now being sold in the States. This little candy bar has such a fan club here that they petitioned Nestle’ to sell it domestically, thereby crippling a cottage industry of Canadians selling the bars to suckers…er, buyers, on eBay. Theoretically, World Market in Pentagon City has the bars, but two trips in the past week have been fruitless. The Wegman‘s in Fairfax was supposed to have them in the store as of yesterday.
We’ve already taken their hockey teams, their top aeronautical engineers from the Avro Arrow project, Tim Horton’s is expanding through the Midwest, we’re holding all of their comics hostage and, frankly, we’re not giving back Jim Carrey or Eugene Levy, but they can reclaim Dan Akroyd at any time. (Sorry about the Phil Hartman thing. We’re still a bit bitter about that, too.)
Once we get their superior pop bands, politeness, health care and near-universal gun ownership, the assimilation will be complete. The United States of Canada has a certain ring, n’est-ce pas?
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07Sep
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06Sep
I go to the grocery store almost every day, looking for something to cook for dinner.
Sometimes inspiration strikes – top sirloin on sale, a strange new vegetable to try, et cetera, but then there are the rare moments when an item just LEAPS! off the shelf, demanding purchase. So it was today, when I stumbled across Nestlé’s Yorkie bars.
As you might guess, I had to buy one. I mean, really, sexist candy? I checked the ingredients for some hint as to this bar’s manliness, and found the following: milk chocolate, raisins, flour, and sugar. That’s it: milk chocolate with raisins and cookie crumbs.
Besides white chocolate, which doesn’t even count, milk chocolate is the un-manliest kind out there, and I just don’t see how dry, shriveled grapes could possibly suggest anything complimentary to anyone’s machismo.
As for the taste, Yorkie is nothing special. The chocolate is better quality than you’d find in a Hershey’s bar, and I have nothing bad to say about adding raisins and cookie to it, but the result is just … fine. Not something I need to spend $2 for over a $0.55 pack of Raisinettes and maybe a $0.45 cookie. And definitely not something that makes me feel all manly and ready for a fight. A beer, perhaps, but girls drink that too. -
03Sep
Upon noting that the farmers market was charging a mere $0.49 per pound for baby bok choi, I decided that it was time to attempt a recreation of a dish I had a few years ago. The dish was roasted duck breast with baby bok choi in a vodka-hoisin sauce. Being a grad student, I can’t afford duck, especially for a first try of a new dish, so I figured I’d just do the bok choi.
A second catch: upon arriving home, I realized that the only vodka I have is of the flavored variety….ew. I figured, “I’m making this up anyways, why not make it up some more?” and I did. The results were quite tasty, and the sauce is one that I plan on keeping around for a number of dishes in the future.
Steam about 2 pounds of baby bok choi, rinse with cold water (and ice, if possible) and set aside.
In a mixing cup, mix 2 parts hoisin sauce (I used Lee Kum Kee), one part shochu (good luck finding this in the US – substitute vodka or sake if needed), and one part vegetable stock. Heat the mixture and stir until fully blended. Adjust proportions until it tastes good.
To serve, you can do what I did, or what I would rather have done.
What I did:
Cut bok choi in half, put in a large bowl, and toss with the sauce.
What I would rather have done:
Arrange bok choi on a serving dish, and drizzle sauce over them.
Enjoy! -
31Aug
It’s juicy and delicious! It’s environmentally sound and low in calories! Yes, to everyone who wanted to know where to buy Kangaroo when we ran the initial article a couple months ago, your entreaties have been heard!
I swear I searched for hours with no luck, when apparently all I should have done was try the simplest URL I could think of. The aptly-named Exotic Meats store (www.exoticmeats.com) have all the Kangaroo muscle protein you desire. As long as what you desire are patties and sausages.
Now, granted, those may indeed be two of the best ways to experience these bouncy marsupials, but if you were hoping for a long-legged steak, you’re still out of luck. In which case, allow me to suggest some antelope, elk, caribou, or rattlesnake- all of which can be provided here. Hey, is that an alligator/crocodile sampler? Well, I didn’t want to pay rent this month anyway.
It looks like shipping to DC is expensive but it could be worse- I say group up with some friends and place one large order, then split the shipping costs. Don’t have any friends? Buy some.
Update: Between the time I wrote this and the time I’m posting it, they just started offering Kangaroo Striploin, which I think is a lovely, delicate, and most importantly, un-ground muscle (someone correct me?). So now you really don’t have any excuse. -
30Aug
Such precious first memories: the first class of 7th grade, the first guy you turned down, the first time you heard the White Stripes. If you’re young enough, they may have all happened within the same hour. And yet, all these pale in comparison to the first time you drink Roasted Rice Tea.
Ooooh that toasty nuttiness. That sweet starchiness. That warm, brown aroma of chestnuts and smoke. It’s possible that this is the most perfect of liquids.
But first, the evidence. The Japanese word Genmaicha technically translates as Popcorn Tea and I don’t know why. It’s definitely made out of green tea (bancha) combined with roasted rice grains (genmai) …maybe they were being poetic? It’s lower in caffeine, and of course, it tastes awesome.
I get mine at Oriental Supermarket on the Rockville Pike where they have a four or five different brands. As I type, I am sucking down Yamamotoyama‘s lovely version, but all of them are delectable.
But for those of you unwilling to spend the $1.75 for a box, here’s what to do:
Roasted rice green tea
Put 2 tablespoons of basmati rice in a small, cast-iron skillet and set over a low flame. Stir them until they turn patchy-dark and give out a nice roasted aroma. Don’t burn ’em no matter how cool that would be!
Put the kernels into a small pot. Add 4 cups boiling water and two teaspoons of good quality green tea- two teabags work too. Simmer for 1 minute. Cover, and turn off the heat. Let the tea steep for 3 minutes, then scoop the liquid off. Or strain- whatever floats your thing. -
26Aug
This sixth installment in the series will continue to focus on happy hour and daily food specials. The listed prices are after discount, but before adding tax and tip.
Rhodeside Grill in the Courthouse area features a half a pound of shrimp on Thursdays for $4.95 anywhere in the restaurant from 4-7 pm. Rhodeside Grill features wings or nachos for $4.95 Wednesdays upstairs or at the downstairs bar from 4pm until the kitchen closes.
CarPool in Ballston features half price ($4) burgers from 4pm until closing on Tuesdays, and 25 cent wings (minimum order of 10) Wednesdays from 4pm until closing. They have selected half price appetizers during happy hour (from 4-7pm Monday through Friday) including Buffalo wings, Jalapeno poppers ($3), chips & salsa ($2), taquitos ($3), mozzarella sticks ($2.50), chips and guacamole ($2.50), and chicken quesadilla ($3). Their happy hour beer specials (from 4-7 pm Monday through Friday) include $2.25 Miller Lite and $2.75 Yuengling, Sam Adams, Sam Adams Seasonal, and Killian’s.
Mackey’s Public House in Crystal City is owned by the same group as CarPool. Mackey’s has the same burger night, and happy hour beer and appetizer specials, but does not have a wings night.
The Continental modern pool lounge in Rosslyn has half price appetizers (Monday through Friday 5-8 pm and Saturday and Sunday 6 pm-9 pm). These featured appetizers are basket of fries ($2.50), hot pretzel basket ($3.00), red hummus with tortilla chips ($3.00), two grilled 2 beer-soaked, all-beef hot dogs ($3.50), chicken tenders ($4.00), Caribbean jerk wings or hot wings ($4), and grilled veggie quesadilla ($3.50, plus an additional $2.00 for beef or chicken). These happy hours also feature $2.50 drafts (Miller Lite, Red Hook I.P.A, Yuengling Lager, and Widmer Hefeweizen), and $3.50 rail drinks (not including margaritas or martinis).
Sine’ Irish Pub on Pentagon Row has half price burgers all day Mondays, including beef, turkey, or veggie burgers. Tuesdays, Sine’ also has $9.95 prime rib all day, and half price appetizers from 4:00-7:00 pm.
Rhodeside Grill
1836 Wilson Blvd.
Arlington, VA
703 243-0145
CarPool
4000 Fairfax Drive
Arlington, VA 22203
703 532-7665
Mackey’s Public House
320 South 23rd Street
Arlington, VA 22202
703 412-1113
The Continental modern pool lounge
1911 N. Fort Myer Drive
Arlington, VA 22209
703 465-7675
Sine’ Irish Pub
1301 S. Joyce St.
Arlington, VA 22202
703 415-4420
Where To Eat In Arlington When You Are Nearly Broke I
Where To Eat In Arlington When You Are Nearly Broke II
Where To Eat In Arlington When You Are Nearly Broke III
Where To Eat In Arlington When You Are Nearly Broke IV
Where To Eat In Arlington When You Are Nearly Broke V -
24Aug
Last night, several of your esteemed DCFUD writers met at Murphy’s in Woodley Park for a pint or three and good ole’ fashioned pub grub. (mini-review – the Murphyburger rocks, the seafood bisque is dandy, and the meat pie was fine; avoid the overly spicy and greasy shellfish soup. Avoid musicians baffled by feedback coming through the sound system).
We were approached by a marketing rep from Sam Adams who asked if we’d like to sample a few of their future beers. We said “Yes!” faster than Jennifer Lopez accepts a marriage proposal. The rep poured us samples of the classic Boston Lager and their Light to get us started. A wise move, as none of us were drinking a Sam Adams’ product beforehand, and the small samples would get us prepared for the brands’ general taste. She then poured us Type A and Type B – two potential beers that they’d release next year. “A” was a Honey Porter, and “B” was a Smoke Ale.
“A” was delicious, with ZAF summing it up that “(we) could get along nicely.” It’s a nice, smooth beer, not terribly heavy, and the honey notes add a softer touch. Amazingly, it doesn’t taste sweet, but a little less acidic than the standard Sam’s.
“B, “ however, was an alcoholic travesty. Comments from the table ranged from “it tastes like smoked ham” to “it tastes like smoked gouda” to “it tastes like they added that Liquid Smoke stuff.” As a rule, beer should not be described as tasting like a barbecue sauce. The best we could say is that it would make an excellent marinade for the Thanksgiving turkey.
In the interests of full disclosure, The FPBBC used to work for Harpoon Brewery in Boston, and has always been partial to his former employer. The Sam Adams’ rep said that a survey found that over 72% of Bostonians preferred Sam Adams over Harpoon as “the” Boston beer. The FPBBC calmly pointed out that Leno has higher ratings than Letterman, proving that popularity has no bearing on taste.
Murphy’s
2609 24th Street NW
Washington DC 20008
202-462-7171 -
24Aug
We at FUD have been remiss. How is it that the months have gone by without even one Snakes on a Plane parody? Could we perhaps be defying the mindless parroting of memes? Oooor, are we just culturally illiterate?
Well, whatever the motivation, Grapeseed‘s chef’s table in Bethesda shares none of our scruples. And so, this Friday and Saturday, NM has tipped us off that they are presenting, yes,
SNAKES ON A PLATE
An evening of a snake-themed set course menu and wine.
To be fair, some of the items would more accurately described as Snake-tribute, like Grilled Baby Octopus ( eight snake like tentacles!), Fresh Tomato, Lemon, and Bucatini (the most snake-like of all pastas), Carbonara. Others are strictly literary: Fresh Churros, Cinnamon Ice Cream (venom served on the side). What other wackiness can Grapeseed come up with? Wait and find out!!!
All that aside, I’ve heard Grapeseed is supposed to be really tasty, so you might as well ride the bandwagon on up to Bethesda and try it out. -
20Aug
As much as we must applaud restaurants that update their menu to reflect seasonal ingredients or new experiments by the chef, it’s always a disappointment when a favorite dish disappears. This happened to me at Tallula, a favorite brunch spot of mine. Sadly, they no longer serve their short ribs and cheesy grits on their brunch menu.
So when the meat guy at the Arlington Farmer’s Market was offering, among other things, short ribs, I decided that the only accompaniment could be cheesy grits. Though my recipe doesn’t precisely invoke Tallula’s (it’s less spicy, for one, and doesn’t feature any green tomatoes), it has a rich, full-bodied flavor and provides the same kind of comfort that my former favorite brunch dish did.
Bourbon Spiked Short Ribs
6 short ribs (from Farmer’s Market)
flour
salt
pepper
2 cloves garlic, crushed
some bourbon (a half cup or so)
oil
white pepper
beef stock (you need almost one of those refrigerator-sized cartons)
thyme
red wine (just a little)
handful of chopped carrots
2 red potatoes, chopped
handful of cherry tomatoes (from Farmer’s Market)
some chopped parsley
Season short ribs with salt and pepper and dredge with flour. Brown in olive oil. Deglaze pan with bourbon. Add all ingredients except broth to a casserole. Pour broth over casserole just below submerging point. Braise for 2.5 hours.
Cheesy Grits
1 cup polenta
1 cup heavy cream
5 cups water
salt
dash of tabasco sauce
1 cup shredded aged cheddar (from Farmer’s Market)
Combine water and polenta in pot. Bring to boil, then simmer for twenty minutes. Add a generous amount of salt. Stir in cream, cheese and tabasco. Heat through.
Serve ribs over grits. I added a side of steamed spinach. -
19Aug
I was recently in New York City, and a group of friends and I ate with at my favorite Thai restaurant, Sripraphai in Queens. They have expanded since I last visited, which is great because the restaurant is very popular. The menu is available here, but may be a bit outdated.One of Sripraphai’s strengths is that they have a refrigerated case filled with Thai desserts, instead of only having a couple of dessert options. We ate so much on this visit that we did not have room for dessert, but past standouts included custard with pumpkin, banana sticky rice, Thai marzipan, and coconut rice squares.
Another of Sripraphai’s strengths is that the restaurant really will give you spicy food. The soups tend to be hotter than the entrees, so a “Thai Spicy” soup can scald those who don’t enjoy very spicy food.
We had an excellent salad (which is pictured above), fried soft shell crab with mango sauce. The crab was crunchy, and went well with the tangy sauce. We also had the shredded green mango salad with squid, shrimp, and chicken. We generally fight over the (off-menu) garlic and pepper shrimp, so we requested two orders of it. I am not a fan of their pad Thai, but someone wanted it, so it was ordered.The noodle dishes I usually order are the rice noodles with ground beef and onions, or (spicy) rice noodles with beef and basil. The curries are great at Sripraphai, including, the red, green, yellow, and jungle curries. The duck with spicy sauce and eggplant was good, as usual, as was the tom zap soup with Cornish hen. In the past, tom zap was only available on the menu with beef offal –which it still is– but we used to substitute seafood for the beef. The fried red snapper with ginger sauce was excellent, and it is the first time we have ordered it at Sripraphai.
We spent about $20 a person including tip, but we did order an extra dish, and several people were drinking Thai iced teas.
Make sure –unlike us– to leave room for dessert. You may need something sweet after all that spicy food.Sripraphai is walking distance from the 61st Street stop on the 7 train.
Sripraphai Thai Restaurant
64-13 39th Avenue
Woodside, NY 11377
(718) 899-9599
